The Crew

The Crew
Christina, Matthew, Joshua and Katie Grace XiHua

Monday, February 1, 2010

ANOTHER OFTEN ASKED QUESTION-WHY DON'T WE ADOPT THE CHILDREN WAITING HERE IN THE U.S?


I have posted about this in the past, but I will do it again as I often get asked this question! As far as choosing domestic adoption first for us here in the US, there are many reasons why it isn't always the best or easiest choice for some families. Although it is an excellent option for the right families! We have already tried the domestic foster care adoption route before, which did not work out due to the child's past abuse and us having children already. If you are interested in adopting a non special needs child under the age of 5 here in the US, you would have to go the private adoption route, adopting a newborn, which is VERY expensive process- $30,000 - $40,000. There are also thousands of families waiting to do that already. Foster care adoption can bee a great option. You can check the foster care photolisings, but I have rarely ever seen any children under 5 available for adoption who are not considerable special needs or who are not a part of a sibling group which must be adopted together. So that narrows options if you are not prepared for the medical and therapy costs and time commitment of a special needs child, or if you don't have room for a sibling group. You can get a foster license with the hope to adopt, should your child become available. If you are a family who has children already, you have to be prepared that adopting from foster care is taking in a child who has been abused physically or sexually- or has been severely neglected. Social services won't place many of them, with families that have young children, for that reason. Now, there ARE many children available in foster care who are 7- 16 years. Many of these children are developing well and have caregivers who are helping them to be healthy. These children deserve a home and a family. For our family situation in particular, we have 3 school age children. It is not recommended in adoption to disrupt the sibling age order, so I makes our choices very difficult! We would definitely still consider adopting from the foster care system, if our current international adoption did not work out for some reason. All children deserve a family. At least here in the US, the orphans have a government support system, albeit not the most ideal situation, to carry the children through to adulthood. In many countries world wide, the children's future is very bleak. This is not an easy choice, and again, there are no easy or "right" answers.
Every adoptive family wants to adopt for various reasons. All are valid. There are choices in adoption and it is wonderful to make those choices that are best for your family. Adoption is beautiful.

1 comment:

  1. Great answer! you are right we all get this question. When we adopted Maya we got it and now that we are adopting again. its whats right for your family plain and simple. Simple never but you knwo what I mean.

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Many hungry children near the boarder of Myanmar and Thailand-click on photo